Make it your own...

I was reading my color coordinating Martha Stewart rag in bed last night and there a very interesting section about ceremonies and how brides tend to overlook them. No, that's not the word I want. It isn't that as brides we overlook the importance of the ceremony or what it means to us to proclaim our unyielding devotion to our misters, it's that commercialism and stylizing all seems to center around the reception.

While the reception is beau coup important, the focal point of the planning and the most important people to keep in mind while planning the awesome party are your guests. (Yes, your guests) Remember, the reception is a place to receive and interact with the people you love as a general celebration and thank you for coming to witness your ceremony. The ceremony? Well, honeys - that is all about you and your honey.

I have to confess, I can play the guilty bride when it comes to neglecting my ceremony. When Jane asked me about ceremony decor, I offered her a blank stare and sweet smile in return. I want to step up and say: never again and thank you Martha! More importantly, thank you for smacking me across the face while I still have a year. Here are some things I know about my ceremony: it will be outside and I don't want any biblical readings. Hopefully, Steve's grandfather will be marrying us and we will have written our own vows.

I have known these things for a while but I haven't done an inch of legwork. Well, let's change that. I am going to start looking into readings. Right now, I have a few authors (Marquez, Tolstoy, Mann, Rilke) that I have always imagined could be read on my wedding day, but now it is time to start to hone in on quotes that are not only about love but can serve as a reflection on who Steve and I are and what we're about not as individuals but as a whole. There are so many wise poets out there and I have such a love for words that although this is a wonderful and reflective task, it is going to be overwhelming. Oh, well, ich suche mit den Hoffnung.

Then there are the processional and recessional, I'm at a loss for this as well. The only thing I do know about this, is that Cannon in D is not coming anywhere near my ceremony. Back in grad school I did a dance to this song and every time I hear it, I can't think of anything else besides the choreography. Anyway I want more contemporary music during the ceremony. Maybe something off of Sufjan Stevens' Seven Swans or Jimmy Eat World's Clarity. While Steve is the music guru and he has insisted on having an electric guitars over a string quartet (I condeded) I don't really want Built to Spill to be played during the ceremony. While typing this, I just realized that somehow, the music is going to be more complex than trying to perfect the readings. Isn't that a little backwards?

here is some eye candy.

I'm working on it!

'it' being another "Dresses I Love but am not Wearing" (by request love mail - that makes me so happy!). I wanted to give myself a challenge and I set the budget to be under $500. I want it to be comprehensive and I'm busy watching 90's television and reading about Lisbeth Salander's impending trial in The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest. I just needed to give a thumbs up and total word to your mom, to my friend Jessica. She writes a much better blog than this one: One Girl No Diet.

It's been on my stalk list and I read it always, but I must, reiterate her earlier statements today about anchovies. You guys, have you ever had anchovy pizza? Pasta Puttanesca made (right) with these delicious fishes? A correct Cesar Salad? No? Then go try it. "Bacon of Fish" - Jessica, the wise.

Why did you leave the knot?

I left the message boards for a few of my own reasons. Those reasons have nothing to do with the amazing women I was lucky enough to connect with on the boards. It was a quick decision that came at the right time for me and while I miss a lot about the community, I know it was the right choice. If you want to get more personal about it you can email me at: xoxobblog@gmail.com.

Ask me anything

Happy Wedding Magazine Day!

I'm super late to snagging this issue but I had kind of forgotten (?!?) about it. I have been consumed with trying to pace myself, my enthusiam lapped my person. I remembered this morning and asked Stevie B to pick me up one at the SoHo rack shop, but Duane Reade gave me two lovely surprises this morning: one being 2/$5 12oz Red Bulls and the other being Martha. Also, I think Ms. Stewart would be proud because my nail polish against that cover is totally copasetic, it's a good thing.

ps. on page 22, they announce they are also in love with Etsy.

It's almost a year!!!

Seriously! Almost a year! Everybody clap your hands!

When Steve convinced me that a longer engagement was more sensible, I never thought it would be this difficult. We had a plethora of reasons: two of my cousins had already set dates within a month of eachother, my mother's divorce proceedings with my stepfather, our ever wise friend Amanda telling Steve if she could do it all over again she would have had more time (thanks, Amanda. Jk, I love you!), and a few other things that seemed to be stacked high on our plates. I also have to say that in our area (NY/CT/NJ) it makes sense to have a longer engagement just so you can take your time with vendor selection. If I had waited on a few of our vendors, I would have lost them - like my beautiful venue The Wadsworth and had I not gotten penned into Brian's calander a less happy bride I would be. Regardless! All of that is in the past right now because, OH MY GOD YOU GUYS, IT'S ALMOST A YEAR AWAY!

Squee!! Now, the reason why I am getting all jabberwoky on you is because now: it's beginning. Steve and I have selected a restaurant to have our "engagement dinner" (I hate calling it an engagement dinner because we've been engaged for so long that we're not announcing anything new here). Yummy mexican food at Mesa Coyocan - walking distance from our house. Homeboy has to start working on invitations because they have to be sent!  This dinner is where we're going to formally ask our nearest and dearest to take a stand next to us on the big day. Bestie Elise is flying in from LA, and we're going to have some amazing out of town guests to host. I am not usually one for ceremony when it comes to these matters (really, a phone call will suffice) but who doesn't love a party? I am excited to be able to do something nice for these wonderful people in our lives. Especially since so many will be coming from out of town if they can make it, the potential for fun is unending.

So now comes the real deal: we're working on invitations to be sent out the first week in July to give everyone a heads up. Once we're all on board, Steve and I get to really start honing in on details without looking like insane people. 

I also have to start mapping out our honeymoon. My mom has been kind enough to bank two weeks of her timeshares for our picks in Hawaii. I need to look over all of our options to figure out where we want to stay, if we want to stay on one island for two weeks or change it up. Has anyone ever been to Hawaii? Any suggestions?

Ithaca is Gorges

Check out that amazing view. That's Kevin, Matt, myself and Dan (Go Red Sox!) looking at probably one of the coolest things I have seen to date. We headed up to Ithaca after work on Friday. Kevin is getting his masters at Cornell and he was amazing enough to organize everything for us, from renting the camp sites to the van. There were a total of seven of us and we camped at a state park. Steve, Bridget, Dan, Matt, Meghan and I got to our campsite after midnight on Friday. Kevin had set up two tents but it was too dark to pitch another so five of us slept in one. It was my first time sleeping in a tent! I had never been camping before so this whole trip was an adventure for me. On Saturday we took an early stroll to see that waterfall. Nature is so impressive.

After being totally awe inspired we trouped off in our  van to begin our wine tasting tour (with Kevin as a truly wonderful and responsible DD). The finger lake area has a ton of wineries and vineyards, there is something about the weather coming off of the lake that stabilizes the climate and makes it great for growing grapes. The area is known especially for its white wines, but my favorite ended up being a Cabernet Franc. Although there are dozens of them we only ended up at six of seven. It's such a good deal, anywhere from $2 to $5 will get you a taste of 2-8 different wines. Some places pour miniature sips, other places pour you half of a glass. It's the good life.
We were all pleasantly tipsy come the end of the day. Here Dan and Steve stroll arm in arm by some growing grapes.

                                                                                     To be perfectly honest, by the time we reached the last winery, I was too boozed to even sample.
The whole experience was slightly overwhelming. The majority of the wines we tasted were absolutely delicious. Some of them? Not so much. There was one winery (I can't recall the name) where the tasting actually happened in the owner's living room. It was a slightly sketchified feel and the whole decor needed an overhaul (as well as a decent dusting). The couple gave a presentation before passing out each sample, while that part was interesting and enjoyable the wine itself was acrid. I'm serious, none of us could enjoy a sip of that garbage! One of the samples had a distinctive ham taste to it. Forever known to me as "Ham Wine" and for the record, I hate ham wine. To add to the wretched flavor, the man who was pouring the samples managed to make lascivious comments toward me and Steve (awkward much?). For all consideration, that was the only poor experience we had. Most of the wineries were delightful. One of them had a goat that we were able to feed treats to. It was a very fat, piggy goat but sweet none the less.

We got back to our camp around 5pm and we all relished in a much deserved nap. After that, we headed into town for dinner and a sneak peek at what Ithaca was like. I have to say, that place has some pretty weird art scattered around (like a bronze statue of a man with a vagabond hat and fairy wings). It's a really wonderful town: super cute and friendly with a great variety of restaurants. I do love a good college town. Saturday night ended with some good ole fashioned campfire fun and a rousing game of "Would You Rather...".

Sunday we got to a slower start. Kevin took us to a bell tower concert on the Cornell campus in honor of the graduating classes. I never thought that bell ringing would be such a rigorous endeavor. The women who were making the bells chime at some points were on one leg, reaching the levers with both hands and a foot. They played an awesome array of classical song and both of them were sweating by the time it was over.

Then we got a delicious lunch and walked the bridges to look over some of the gorges. It was so hot we decided that we should go swimming in one of the quarries. Steve and I hadn't brought bathing suits so we went to wal-mart in order to procure some inexpensive ones. For a grand total of $15, here is what we came up with:

Pretty rich, right? We got a whole lot of looks for that one. Some people genuinely complimented our patriotic attire.

I can't even begin to explain how much fun it was to swim along these rocks. It was pretty incredible. There were rocks to climb on, ledges to jump off. I even swam under a waterfall, that was so cool. Dan said it had been something he'd always wanted to do - Kevin made sure it happened. We stayed there for a good amount of time then grabbed food at a grocery store and headed back to camp.

Sunday night was another great time around the campfire, making s'mores and playing drinking games. For someone who had never been around a real campfire like that with a bunch of friends it was a great experience. It was such a good time, it was bananas. Here is a final montage of experiences: