xoxo, b

hello?

2010-09-30T17:47:00.000-04:00

I know I'm a total failure at blog-living.

Sorry, big things are in the works though and they don't really involve weddings.

If anyone is still out there reading this:

here is a shameless plug!!! our engagement session by Brian Ambrose Photography

The first rule of wedding planning is...

2010-08-04T17:00:00.001-04:00

You and your fiance are the only people expected to be excited about your upcoming nuptials. It is safe to say that every bride secretly 'expects' certain people to be excited and interested in wedding planning, simply because that's what friends and family do. I'm an exceptionally lucky girl because more than my 'expected' handful have announced their excitement, asked about potentially boring details or down right offered to help me. Yes, I am so very lucky. Perhaps because so many of these enthusiasts are unexpected friends, that the absence of certain peoples' interest feels exceptionally large. I'm not angry, I'm not trying to whine and say: people who aren't even supposed to care do and this person doesn't - how horrible is that? Because I know the rules of wedding planning and I know that no one is obligated to ask or to care. That doesn't mean that someones apparent apathy isn't going to down right hurt and make me feel like the total pitts. It wigs me out that I've allowed someones total disinterest hang such a cloud over my head, but it has and it hurts and that hurt gets displaced into anger and that's not right. I guess it's just the way it is, tough.

Anyway, here is the list of things we have to accomplish in the next year:
1. Find Someone to marry us (eek).
2. Transportation
3. Save the Dates
4. Invitations
5. DJ
6. Ceremony Music
7. Gather more vintage-looking cut bowls
8. Favors?
9. Bridesmaid dresses
10. Suits for Steve and the guys
11. Escort card fiasco (it's a battle right now)
12. Out of Town Bags
13. Hair/Makeup for me
14. I need shoes
15. Honeymoon - everything
16. First Dance
17. Details, details, details
18. Should we or should we not get a tent?
19. Parents gifts
20. Buy attendants gifts
21. Figure out where the cake is coming from
22. Rehearsal dinner location

...OK, I think that's it? Hopefully some of this can be accomplished during September since I have like 10 days off thanks to Jewish Holidays.

test.

2010-08-01T00:21:00.003-04:00

xoxo, from Reading, PA and my new phone.

test.

2010-08-01T00:21:00.001-04:00

xoxo, from Reading, PA and my new phone.

baby loves a theme...

2010-07-28T16:12:00.000-04:00

Helvetica isn't working. It keeps giving me Helvetica's evil step-brother Arial. I'm not having a great day. I wouldn't even call it a good day. I'm kind of stressing about absolutely everything for no particular reason and it's making me cranky and melancholy. I'm pretty sure this has to do with not having my ADHD medication totally copacetic with my brain.* I feel like these down times of pseudo restless sadness are good times to push myself to do things that stimulate me in a way I find gratifying; and since I like to wax loftily with my unsolicited (sometimes solicited) advice, I am going to talk about wedding party thank you gifts!

This was one of the FAQ's on TK's boards when I was a regular and I think it's a good one, although you should probably scan a message board before you ask this question, if you jump the gun you'll be the 12,000,000th customer. So, let me answer this question (again): DO NOT BE FOOLED. I know, it's a little known fact that marketing departments like to trick us brides into buying a million pieces of junk that we will never want to see again after the wedding is over. Your bridesmaids do not want bedazzled shirts that declare 'team bride' or 'bridesmaid' or 'brideslave', etc. They also don't want totes filled with glittering plastic that will break and clutter up their closets and/or trash bins. They're probably also big girls and you can rely on them to pick out their own jewelry for the day of your wedding, and buying them something for the day of YOUR wedding is not a thank you gift, it's a uniform. David Tutera is wrong, they don't need to wear the same accessories. Your bridesmaids want to feel appreciated and acknowledged. The same kind of acknowledgement that you want, simply for being a bride. They're individuals and they're your best friends; if all of your best friends have the same taste in jewelry, I don't believe you. Etiquette and the power of friendship compels you to treat them as individuals, not a collective hive. So, keep them in mind as your besties not as your bridesmaids.

That being said...is there anything wrong with a theme? Steve loves themes and so do I.** We had one conversation about wedding party gifts and it went something like this:

Steve: Oh, yeah....I have to get them presents. How much should we spend?
Me: Hmph. I don't know? How much do we love them?
Steve: Like $75-$100 worth?
Me: That seems reasonable.

FYI, Steve and I do not actually put a dollar value on how much we love our friends. This is just the way we talk. Also, that is a lot of money for us, we just love our friends and they have all been wonderful to us. Anyway, there was a lull in the conversation and I was probably watching Law and Order: Criminal Intent, when I look over and see Steve's screen.

Me: OMG! You're not looking at Things Remembered, are you? No! Bad Steve!
Steve: What? That's what you do for gifts. Aren't you getting the girls jewelry with their initials on it?
Me: I have no idea what I am getting 'them', I'm not getting 'them' anything, I'm getting 5 of my friends a present! 'Them' as a group, not withstanding!
Steve: Ok, wedding Nazi. So...cuff links?
Me: No! You have to get them something that they will all love as individuals.
Steve: Can't I get them all the same thing, but different? I think there should be a theme. I like themes, everything should be themed.
Me: Only if it's the most righteous theme ever like spoiler alert.

And then there was this awesome moment of clarity where we just stared at each other and realized, we had the most epic theme ever. The theme will not end with the groomsmen, because my ladies are for sure getting this theme, too. I am so excited because everyone is going to be thrilled with their gift and Steve's compulsive need for thematic presents will be fulfilled. Every time I think of it, I just want to cackle like the devil in the pale moonlight, I'm so stoked on buying them their presents. If you've ever read my response to this question on the message boards, then you probably know how I finished that sentence and what the theme is. If you do, I hope you get a chuckle out of this (something that started as a persistent joke is being realized) and don't say it because my wedding party reads my blog - and I really like to give them teasers.

* These things are a delicate science and for any ladies who have been contemplating toying with mood altering drugs on your wedding day, M addresses every reason (better than I could) why you shouldn't here.

** I'm going to pull this once: I don't care what you think about themes!! This is going to be hilarious and everyone will love it and laugh, and it will be epic, don't judge me! It's MY day.

Attempts

2010-07-23T11:08:00.000-04:00

HOLY CRAP! BLOGGER HAS HELVETICA!!!

Ok, sorry. That excitement is over. I am, really excited though. Helvetica is best, invest.

I'm not really sure where my blog is going to go from here. I have been having some struggles. Earlier this week I was diagnosed with ADHD (for the third time) and have started a fairly strict regiment to help me live with it, but more importantly adapt to the treatment of it. I have had it forever, just never maintained proper care of a problem. Now I'm so used to the mental static that the clarity is making me feel estranged - even lonely. One of the symptoms of ADHD that I had fallen prey to was an inability to finish things. I would ravenously (almost manically) start a project and then the anxiety that came with a possibility of failure would just make me shut down, become lethargic and start a whole new project. In turn, I would have all of these haphazard started ideas that would never be realized.

I started to get depressed a few months ago when I realized that my notebook (I love writing) was filled with stories and poems that were 1/4 finished, 1/2 finshed, plot outlines that should have been started but never were. Then, when I came back to work from vacation I came back to a mass of lists that were scribbled and re-noted, crossed off an starred, a complete chaos system that funked me out because it was so overwhelming. Trying to handle the situation started to give me tension headaches that turned into migraines. I would get so bogged down by distractions that I would literally stand in front of a water fountain for a good 30 seconds before I remembered to fill my bottle. It was seriously time to take control. I was nervous because I have a horrible history with medications, but I sucked it up. My doctor and I had a conversation that went something like this:

Dr.: So, you like writing but you haven't been writing?
Me: Uh-huh...
Dr.: Do you write at all?
Me: I have a blog? I've been neglecting it...I have a book of unfinished poems, and a yelp page?
Dr.: Ok, let's get you some homework assignments.

Since Dr. realizes that I am not at a stage where I can be trusted to write daily if I have to be held accountable for the content, we have decided on this: I have to write a daily Yelp review. It's easier than a blog post because the subject matter is given to me, I am in control of the length of the article and it's theraputic because it's writing. Hopefully once my mind and body adjusts to the adderall and I can level out, I'll be able to go back to writing the way I used to. Steve says I shouldn't give up my blog, though. So I won't. I'm going to try to keep it going, I just can't promise anything in the way of continuity. Steve said that, if I make it a point to write one blog post (about anything!) a week, it's like doing extra credit, and if I write one Yelp review a day and one blog post a week for the next month, he will get me a surprise. I like surprises, AND HELVETICA! He is such a good fiance, he just wants me to get better and happy.

So, yeah. If you've been here solely for wedding, I guess I'll see you later. Obviously, there will be wedding talk but I think that this needs to turn into a more theraputic space of interwebs because I'm not good at following through on themes (let's hope Yelp helps). By theraputic I don't necessarily mean a journal of my struggles with ADHD or with anything. Stop back and you may find some short stories or some pieces of memoirs or some more "OMG, YOU GUYS. HELVETICA" a movie or book review, a haiku, I don't know (I don't know if I'll have the time).

If you like my writing and want to make me feel good about myself by commenting on my reviews you can go here.

i, idiosyncratic

2010-07-14T11:51:00.000-04:00

I'm going to wax personal at you: I have never been popular. I am not even good at being popular. I remember going to a summer party back in 2005 and this girl I went to HS with was like, "OMG, B. I can't believe you're being so nice to me. I always thought you hated me." and I was like, "Derp?! lulz. No, never." (and it's true, I never hated this girl, and she just shrugged and was like, "Well I was just pretty sure you hated everyone." My head probably tilted like a pinball machine and I almost 100% definitely pouted. However, this was not a new phenomena in my life, in Kindergarten my teacher had to call my mom because some girl ran home crying because I vehemently refused to play with her. I never offered an explanation as to why. PS. I still don't know why, sorry, girl. I hope you don't hold it against me and somehow in the future have the ability to influence my life in a negative way and opt for vengeance.

I do have a lot of popular friends. I have always had well-loved friends and have lingered like a creep on the fringes of their social groups silently judging those I didn't like and wistfully wishing that the ones I did like would be nice to me. Unfortunately, my 'I don't like you and am silently judging you face' and my 'Plz come play wif me' faces are strikingly similar and I am oft misunderstood (FYI, I also look like that when I am trying to get something out of my teeth, so sometimes I'm not doing anything except eating). Anyway, I have always been a tiny bit jealous of my friends who always know a bazillion people and everyone remembers their birthdays and wants to say "hi". This envy has never paralyzed me or made me feel lonely and in fact I feel that my inability to be nice to everyone has actually given me a beneficial position in life. I am only surrounded by the people I chose to be and by god they better live up to my insanely high standards of friendship, valor and zombie fighting.

The problem is this: when I do become liked or slightly popular at a certain place, I become ferocious. I mean, I go ballistically Regina George, I get jealous of new people who enter the room, I sulk when someone gets more attention than me, I over compensate by talking loudly and flailing my arms...it's embarrassing and I get mean. What? Why? I have no freaking idea. I could blame it on my only childhood but I was never attention starved. I could hypothesize that it's because I have, on numerous occasions been mortified by people I pledged an unyielding loyalty to, because every time I make a friend I make a promise of Musketeer style loyalty (It's kind of creepy and often not reciprocated and then you are little black Xs over your eyes in all of our pictures dead to me). It could be because I never really looked like a child just a small, very creepy adult Anyway, there are a bunch of fingers I could point and a million savage tears I could cry but I don't like to place undue blame anywhere.

The point is: it's a personal problem and I clearly need to work on my people skills. This is kind of wedding related because if I teeter on "Judgy Face" and "Attention Starved Rapid Chipmunk" then my guests will probably hate me all day. I also need to get a grip otherwise I will probably cry myself to sleep if we prove not to be the most awesome trivia team of all time in Sweet Ups' finals on the 27th. I feel like the bartenders there genuinely like me and that gives me heartburn - I don't want to let them down. If we don't win, we will no longer be the center of attention, we'll have been abandoned, everyone will judge us instead of us having the ability and right to judge them. Is my point coming across? I am nuerotically inappropriate with this! And yes! It has to do with something so frivolous as popularity. Over the years I have tried to adapt to be all like, "I don't care" exterior and to an extent it's true, I honestly don't care about most people's opinions. But, but, but...the other team was so snarky to us! I never want them to win a danged thing in their entire lives! You see? It's a vicious cycle.

OK. I think I'm done. I'm sorry if this sounds really stupid or whiny. It's just how I feel right now.

OMG. HI!

2010-07-12T11:54:00.000-04:00

I have been totally, 100% MIA from this lil' old blog of mine. That's ok, though. I was mostly enjoying myself.

Because I am no good at re-hashing a weeks worth of nonevents and events, I am going to sumarize this way. Rye and Fette Sau, next time you're in Brooklyn you want to eat at those locations. Also, don't ride your bike when it feels like 102 degrees on the 4th of July. Trust me and save yourself the struggles.

My cousin got married this weekend!!! Yay Bob and Allison! It was a gorgeous and delicious wedding and I am so lucky to have been there. I hadn't been to their venue (The Aqua Turf in Southington, CT) since my senior prom but I was blown away by how beautiful and detailed everything was. Allison was a stunning bride. It was a great time with friends, family and food. My mom managed to break her ankle getting to the car though, so I could have done without that.

Bob's wedding reaffirmed something for me: we're taking dancing lessons. They were having so much fun and their first dance was just to die for. I'm getting teary eyed again, y'all. Weddings...they bring out so much amazing.

Tonight Steve and I are hammering out a timeline for our wedding! I can't wait. :) Ok. I'm feeling stale and I need to catch up on my work (and blog reading) I have been away from the internet for a good chunk o' time.

what is your favorite food?

2010-06-29T23:46:00.001-04:00

bacon.

Ask me anything

hello?

2010-06-29T23:44:00.000-04:00

It has been two twelve hour days. Thank you, inventory. Up on my feet, away from the internet, counting menorahs, kiddush cups, and alef bet games. You know what? When I come staggering home around 10:30pm, franzia is my only friend. This is my hella sad and tired face.

BUT. Vacay starts on Friday and then it's a week of sleeping late and hanging out in New York City. We would go somewhere, if we weren't planning a wedding...and could like, afford it. But, I'm not going to lie: so so so nice to have a week off with my boo!

I was going to say more, but I can't remember. I'm too tired so here is an Elvis for you to enjoy. Don't reproach my absence:

one of those days...

2010-06-25T12:00:00.000-04:00

You know? Today has been the total pitts when it comes to my mental stability and train of thought and I think I may be dressed slightly inappropriate for work. Furthermore, why do those bananas own pajamas but no suitable attire for being in public? Happy friday, y'all.

It's Thursday!

2010-06-24T11:43:00.000-04:00

Which means it's almost Friday! Does anyone have any awesome weekend plans? Steve and I may register Elvis for a "How Fast Is Your Wiener" Race. A-yup, a dachshund dash.

Tonight we are going to a gallery opening in Chelsea (we're so New York). Steve's childhood friend Emily works for a gallery, so when we're lucky we get privy to the posh 11th avenue art world (and free wine!). Last night I went to Union Pool with my friend Chris to see a secret Rapture show. It was so much fun. They were very successful at keeping it on the down low so the back room wasn't too cramped albeit still packed. They played so many good jams, I boogied completely. While I was watching the show all I could think of was that scene in Nick and Nora's Ultimate Playlist where they go to Union Pool thinking the band is going to be there but its something else entirely...something horrible. There is this one guy getting it on all by himself. You have to wonder: dude, your taste in music sucks but you're having fun at a solo show.

quick iPod project update: I have 45 songs, and have listened to about 600.

hi! I like your blog. My wedding is in a year and I think what you have to say is pretty cool. Are you on a diet? What do you suggest for losing weight before the big day?

2010-06-23T11:55:00.001-04:00

Thanks! It's good to know I am not the only person who thinks what I have to say is pretty cool. Haha.

To answer your question: no, I am not on a diet but that doesn't mean that I don't have a diet. I'm gluten intolerant and have been gluten free for two years now. That makes it easy to avoid delicious carb foods and cakes. I try to eat healthily and I'm sure to only eat when I'm hungry, not when I'm bored (ok, sometimes when I'm bored).

The biggest restriction I have on myself is that I only drink soda on the weekends. I am a soda addict and for the sake of my teeth and my waist line, I implemented this system. Trying to limit sugary drinks is probably not a bad step for anyone.

In general, I am not a fan of diets. In my experience, diets make food the enemy. Food is your fuel and your friend, totally not the enemy. Poor choices and lack of self control are you enemy. I do understand the desire to slim down and look the best for your day but a crash diet is never the answer. Think about how stressed and busy you will be in the weeks before your wedding - how are you going to cope with all of that stress and running around if you are going on a half empty tank? Do not want.

Since you have a year, you have plenty of time. Evaluate how much weight you want to lose. Is it a matter of a couple of pounds? This can probably be done by doing something as simple as taking the stairs every day at work instead of the elevator, switching to skim milk in your lattes, or exercising more restraint when it comes to your portions.

Do you want to lose more than that? Maybe you could re-vamp your lifestyle entirely. Analyze your eating habbits and think about why you're eating what you're eating. There are a lot of great programs that can help for this kind of thing. A lot of people I know have had great success with Weight Watchers. The key to their progress was that they didn't expect to just buy a ton of frozen weight watcher meals and snacks and shed the pounds, they applied the system to everything. They learned about what they were putting into their bodies and how much of it they were putting in. The program grows with you (or shrinks with you) as you go on and not only will it help you lose weight in a stable manner, it can give you the tools to maintaining your new shape!

I'm not trying to sound like an advertisement. I've just met a lot of people with a lot of positive feed back. Of course, I am not a doctor or a dietician, so you should probably consult an expert before you make any rash decisions.

The best advice I can give is: eat healthy and exercise. Yay? I hope you still think what I have to say is pretty cool.

Ask me anything

iPod Project Official Day 1

2010-06-22T12:57:00.000-04:00

I promise I won't post daily progress on the project, but this is the first day! I was feeling quite ambitious and decided that instead of filtering through and only listen to wedding appropriate bands, I was going to put my entire iPod...on shuffle!!! Aaaah!! All 8,000 songs! It's lunch time and I have gotten through about 430 of them. I haven't listened to a lot of them all the way through (obviously) and sometimes I'm not even sure what these songs are doing on my iPod! Out of the 430, I have 23 songs I put on the list. But that's not all: check out how organized I am:

Totally color coded! I love color coding. I have a selection for songs that should be played later on in the evening and also songs that I am thinking of for the cocktail hour. I am on this wedding bizniz. What are your favorite songs to boogie to at weddings?

iPod Project

2010-06-21T14:17:00.000-04:00

Happy Father's Day, Dad!!!

Did everyone have a nice weekend? I was murderously ill on Friday with a migraine to write home about, no bueno. Even still, we headed down to Philadelphia to kick it with Steve's family for the weekend. It was a great time, we hit up a flea market in Lambertsville and picked up two carved glass bowls for our centerpeices. On Sunday we went to a family picnic on the Susquehana and ate a bunch of delicious food.

The 3 hour ride into the middle of nowhere PA on Sunday, caused quite a stir about our reception music. There are a lot of songs that I don't want anywhere near our wedding, which some people think are a necessity. I won't go all Bravo TV on anyone, but Single Ladies will not be played during my bouquet toss, the chicken dance, macarena and electric slide are in permanent exile and I will not be accepting any bribe to ensure Stairway to Heaven is the last dance. With the exception of those death stare worthy suggestions, I am pretty open to what music is played. I think that the best play lists surprise and delight and I want my guests to have a simply delightful time! In fact there is an overwhelming amount of music that I want played; however Steve and I have different ideas of what should and shouldn't be played during the reception so we have launched a project into compromise!

THE iPOD PROJECT!

Each of us has a small portable notepad and pen to be kept on us at all times. Over the next 4-5 months we're required to listen to every viable band on our ipod (Iron Maiden, Orchid and Converge need not apply) and write down the songs that we think are a good fit for our reception. Everything that is on the shared list will automatically be included, the others have to be given a fair listen to and a mutual verdict will be handed down. The final list, on top of those songs that are already on a play list at the bequest of our family will then be handed over to the DJ we (finally) hire, then we'll get professional feedback. Sounds good, right?! We'll see.

On a side note, it's Monday and I am already counting down until Friday (insert heavy sigh). All of the traveling just makes the weekend seem like not much of a weekend. Here is what I want to do this weekend: ride my new bike, eat ice cream, go to a park, sun bathe, listen to music (via the ipod project), play some rock band. And did I show you my new bike yet? No! Good heavens, check it pretties:

Isn't it something? The Fuji feather...I love it! I totally shouldn't have purchased it, but I love it. I rationalize the splurge on the fact that Steve adores riding bikes. I never felt safe on the one I bought for $70 off of some guy on the street and not only was it a sketchy ride, but it was waaay too heavy and big for me. Fluffy (my name for the bike) rides like a dream and I get super stoked on riding her all over Brooklyn! So, while I should not have probably spent the dimes, I see her as an investiment in future (free) time spent with Steve and a mutual hobby. Blah, blah, blah....but she also promotes health! Go, Fluffy, go!!

Gowns I love, but could never wear....pt 2

2010-06-17T10:51:00.000-04:00

And to be honest, with some of these dresses it's not that I could never wear them; it's that I already have my dress and it's the most perfect thing you will ever see after I get hitched (correction, second most because duh your wedding dress is the most perfect). Here they are: some gorgeous gowns that will run you less than $500:

Let's get right into it.

1. Sue Wong Embroidered V-Neck Gown, $488 at Nordstrom.com. This is great for someone who loves the laced beaded look for less. Antiqued styled dresses can often be exceptionally expensive because lace is costly and beading is labor intensive. This lovely Sue Wong gown offers the same vintage inspired feeling for a lot less than some others will run you.

2. Aidan Mattox Strapless Gown, $370 at Norstrom.com. I love this gown and so do people who have purchased it! It has gotten rave reviews from people who bought it online for both weddings and vow renewal ceremonies. That's always nice to read, right? People were enthused with the quality and loved the way the subtle silver patterning was set against the ivory. What I love about this dress is that the designer remembered my favorite rule: elegance is simplicity. I feel like sometimes less expensive designers go over the top with embellishments trying to create an uber fancy gown and they end up making it look costumey. I think this is a chic feeling dress with a good price tag.

4. Open Back Pleated Gown, $398 at BCBG.com. The Grecian revival is not my style at all, but this gown embodies the trend of the times in a classic way. Without the over done drapery that, in my humble opinion, has some wedding gowns looking like a toga hybrid, this gown has a flowing elegance and simplicity that makes it wonderful for an intimate wedding or beach setting affair.

5. Silk Avery Dress, $450 at JCrew.com. You didn't think I would leave J Crew out of this, did ya?! I have spied so many brides wearing J Crew in the last year and (bahda-da-da) I'm loving it! The clean cut, irresistible lines and natural cling of the fabric just make this dress my choice; and it has also gotten rave reviews!

I wanted to say something about wedding dresses in general again, inspired by a post on Sane Bride about picking the dress. Everyone has their dream dress and what they think they want and what they end up with. My advice is pure and simple: go with your gut and never be discouraged in your choice. Sometimes it's painful to be looking at these weddings online and seeing these ravishingly expensive gowns. No matter what your budget, as long as you carry yourself with grace and sophistication and allow all of your joy radiate out, you will be the most gorgeous bride on the face of the planet. Trust me! Every bride I have seen has been the most beautiful girl in the world (except for one bride, but I h8 her so she doesn't count). The main function of the gown is to enhance your shine, your energy and your confidence.

I knew that my dress was the dress because when I looked in the mirror I started to cry uncontrollably. How did you know?

I am so tired!

2010-06-15T10:16:00.000-04:00

I am feeling more Red Bull inspired than I am wedding inspired. In spite of all of my elation that I get to start planning, I'm all like "...what up?" I found a new great blog though! Sane Bride Advice. I read the articles on picking your colors and I thought I would just pay homage to my own:

Dear Navy Blue and Orange,

Seriously, you're the best. Orange: you come in so many shades and varieties and you lend yourself to the natural nuances of my venue, what could I do without you? And Navy, you! You embrace the greens and brown accents that autumnal New England offers. So, thank you for adding your richness to nature. My dear colors, I cannot wait to see you in all of your glory. (which will be my wedding day, because I am not a Mets fan)

XOXO,
B

I told you I was tired. On the flip side, I think there is some sound reasoning to my love letter. It is the same sound reasoning that goes into what the ladies at Sane were saying: your colors should enhance your environment, not fight it. I am kind of a purist when it comes to the need to respect seasonal colors. I will tell anyone as much as well. Just ask me what I think about black, red and silver for an outdoor wedding set in the middle of July.

I also don't think you should be inflexible with your colors as long as you keep with the same base. I plan on having multiple shades of blue - sans anything crossing the line into the aqua or Tiffany blue region. We won't wage ware on that, royal blues, natural blues and anything with that kind of purple base. For the orange, I am going to steer clear of anything that doesn't look like a natural orange. I am thinking more of a burnt fall-ish color.

That's all I got. Inventory is in a few days and I have a pile of work on my desk. I do have some well reviewed wedding dresses under $500 to share. Soon! In other news, I think I am buying a bike tonight!

Make it your own...

2010-06-11T10:18:00.000-04:00

I was reading my color coordinating Martha Stewart rag in bed last night and there a very interesting section about ceremonies and how brides tend to overlook them. No, that's not the word I want. It isn't that as brides we overlook the importance of the ceremony or what it means to us to proclaim our unyielding devotion to our misters, it's that commercialism and stylizing all seems to center around the reception.

While the reception is beau coup important, the focal point of the planning and the most important people to keep in mind while planning the awesome party are your guests. (Yes, your guests) Remember, the reception is a place to receive and interact with the people you love as a general celebration and thank you for coming to witness your ceremony. The ceremony? Well, honeys - that is all about you and your honey.

I have to confess, I can play the guilty bride when it comes to neglecting my ceremony. When Jane asked me about ceremony decor, I offered her a blank stare and sweet smile in return. I want to step up and say: never again and thank you Martha! More importantly, thank you for smacking me across the face while I still have a year. Here are some things I know about my ceremony: it will be outside and I don't want any biblical readings. Hopefully, Steve's grandfather will be marrying us and we will have written our own vows.

I have known these things for a while but I haven't done an inch of legwork. Well, let's change that. I am going to start looking into readings. Right now, I have a few authors (Marquez, Tolstoy, Mann, Rilke) that I have always imagined could be read on my wedding day, but now it is time to start to hone in on quotes that are not only about love but can serve as a reflection on who Steve and I are and what we're about not as individuals but as a whole. There are so many wise poets out there and I have such a love for words that although this is a wonderful and reflective task, it is going to be overwhelming. Oh, well, ich suche mit den Hoffnung.

Then there are the processional and recessional, I'm at a loss for this as well. The only thing I do know about this, is that Cannon in D is not coming anywhere near my ceremony. Back in grad school I did a dance to this song and every time I hear it, I can't think of anything else besides the choreography. Anyway I want more contemporary music during the ceremony. Maybe something off of Sufjan Stevens' Seven Swans or Jimmy Eat World's Clarity. While Steve is the music guru and he has insisted on having an electric guitars over a string quartet (I condeded) I don't really want Built to Spill to be played during the ceremony. While typing this, I just realized that somehow, the music is going to be more complex than trying to perfect the readings. Isn't that a little backwards?

2010-06-10T12:56:00.002-04:00

here is some eye candy.

I'm working on it!

2010-06-10T10:59:00.001-04:00

'it' being another "Dresses I Love but am not Wearing" (by request love mail - that makes me so happy!). I wanted to give myself a challenge and I set the budget to be under $500. I want it to be comprehensive and I'm busy watching 90's television and reading about Lisbeth Salander's impending trial in The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest. I just needed to give a thumbs up and total word to your mom, to my friend Jessica. She writes a much better blog than this one: One Girl No Diet.

It's been on my stalk list and I read it always, but I must, reiterate her earlier statements today about anchovies. You guys, have you ever had anchovy pizza? Pasta Puttanesca made (right) with these delicious fishes? A correct Cesar Salad? No? Then go try it. "Bacon of Fish" - Jessica, the wise.

Why did you leave the knot?

2010-06-10T00:04:00.001-04:00

I left the message boards for a few of my own reasons. Those reasons have nothing to do with the amazing women I was lucky enough to connect with on the boards. It was a quick decision that came at the right time for me and while I miss a lot about the community, I know it was the right choice. If you want to get more personal about it you can email me at: xoxobblog@gmail.com.

Ask me anything

Happy Wedding Magazine Day!

2010-06-09T09:57:00.000-04:00

I'm super late to snagging this issue but I had kind of forgotten (?!?) about it. I have been consumed with trying to pace myself, my enthusiam lapped my person. I remembered this morning and asked Stevie B to pick me up one at the SoHo rack shop, but Duane Reade gave me two lovely surprises this morning: one being 2/$5 12oz Red Bulls and the other being Martha. Also, I think Ms. Stewart would be proud because my nail polish against that cover is totally copasetic, it's a good thing.

ps. on page 22, they announce they are also in love with Etsy.

It's almost a year!!!

2010-06-08T10:09:00.000-04:00

Seriously! Almost a year! Everybody clap your hands!

When Steve convinced me that a longer engagement was more sensible, I never thought it would be this difficult. We had a plethora of reasons: two of my cousins had already set dates within a month of eachother, my mother's divorce proceedings with my stepfather, our ever wise friend Amanda telling Steve if she could do it all over again she would have had more time (thanks, Amanda. Jk, I love you!), and a few other things that seemed to be stacked high on our plates. I also have to say that in our area (NY/CT/NJ) it makes sense to have a longer engagement just so you can take your time with vendor selection. If I had waited on a few of our vendors, I would have lost them - like my beautiful venue The Wadsworth and had I not gotten penned into Brian's calander a less happy bride I would be. Regardless! All of that is in the past right now because, OH MY GOD YOU GUYS, IT'S ALMOST A YEAR AWAY!

Squee!! Now, the reason why I am getting all jabberwoky on you is because now: it's beginning. Steve and I have selected a restaurant to have our "engagement dinner" (I hate calling it an engagement dinner because we've been engaged for so long that we're not announcing anything new here). Yummy mexican food at Mesa Coyocan - walking distance from our house. Homeboy has to start working on invitations because they have to be sent! This dinner is where we're going to formally ask our nearest and dearest to take a stand next to us on the big day. Bestie Elise is flying in from LA, and we're going to have some amazing out of town guests to host. I am not usually one for ceremony when it comes to these matters (really, a phone call will suffice) but who doesn't love a party? I am excited to be able to do something nice for these wonderful people in our lives. Especially since so many will be coming from out of town if they can make it, the potential for fun is unending.

So now comes the real deal: we're working on invitations to be sent out the first week in July to give everyone a heads up. Once we're all on board, Steve and I get to really start honing in on details without looking like insane people.

I also have to start mapping out our honeymoon. My mom has been kind enough to bank two weeks of her timeshares for our picks in Hawaii. I need to look over all of our options to figure out where we want to stay, if we want to stay on one island for two weeks or change it up. Has anyone ever been to Hawaii? Any suggestions?

Ithaca is Gorges

2010-06-03T10:47:00.000-04:00

Check out that amazing view. That's Kevin, Matt, myself and Dan (Go Red Sox!) looking at probably one of the coolest things I have seen to date. We headed up to Ithaca after work on Friday. Kevin is getting his masters at Cornell and he was amazing enough to organize everything for us, from renting the camp sites to the van. There were a total of seven of us and we camped at a state park. Steve, Bridget, Dan, Matt, Meghan and I got to our campsite after midnight on Friday. Kevin had set up two tents but it was too dark to pitch another so five of us slept in one. It was my first time sleeping in a tent! I had never been camping before so this whole trip was an adventure for me. On Saturday we took an early stroll to see that waterfall. Nature is so impressive.

After being totally awe inspired we trouped off in our van to begin our wine tasting tour (with Kevin as a truly wonderful and responsible DD). The finger lake area has a ton of wineries and vineyards, there is something about the weather coming off of the lake that stabilizes the climate and makes it great for growing grapes. The area is known especially for its white wines, but my favorite ended up being a Cabernet Franc. Although there are dozens of them we only ended up at six of seven. It's such a good deal, anywhere from $2 to $5 will get you a taste of 2-8 different wines. Some places pour miniature sips, other places pour you half of a glass. It's the good life.
We were all pleasantly tipsy come the end of the day. Here Dan and Steve stroll arm in arm by some growing grapes.

To be perfectly honest, by the time we reached the last winery, I was too boozed to even sample.
The whole experience was slightly overwhelming. The majority of the wines we tasted were absolutely delicious. Some of them? Not so much. There was one winery (I can't recall the name) where the tasting actually happened in the owner's living room. It was a slightly sketchified feel and the whole decor needed an overhaul (as well as a decent dusting). The couple gave a presentation before passing out each sample, while that part was interesting and enjoyable the wine itself was acrid. I'm serious, none of us could enjoy a sip of that garbage! One of the samples had a distinctive ham taste to it. Forever known to me as "Ham Wine" and for the record, I hate ham wine. To add to the wretched flavor, the man who was pouring the samples managed to make lascivious comments toward me and Steve (awkward much?). For all consideration, that was the only poor experience we had. Most of the wineries were delightful. One of them had a goat that we were able to feed treats to. It was a very fat, piggy goat but sweet none the less.

We got back to our camp around 5pm and we all relished in a much deserved nap. After that, we headed into town for dinner and a sneak peek at what Ithaca was like. I have to say, that place has some pretty weird art scattered around (like a bronze statue of a man with a vagabond hat and fairy wings). It's a really wonderful town: super cute and friendly with a great variety of restaurants. I do love a good college town. Saturday night ended with some good ole fashioned campfire fun and a rousing game of "Would You Rather...".

Sunday we got to a slower start. Kevin took us to a bell tower concert on the Cornell campus in honor of the graduating classes. I never thought that bell ringing would be such a rigorous endeavor. The women who were making the bells chime at some points were on one leg, reaching the levers with both hands and a foot. They played an awesome array of classical song and both of them were sweating by the time it was over.

Then we got a delicious lunch and walked the bridges to look over some of the gorges. It was so hot we decided that we should go swimming in one of the quarries. Steve and I hadn't brought bathing suits so we went to wal-mart in order to procure some inexpensive ones. For a grand total of $15, here is what we came up with:

Pretty rich, right? We got a whole lot of looks for that one. Some people genuinely complimented our patriotic attire.

I can't even begin to explain how much fun it was to swim along these rocks. It was pretty incredible. There were rocks to climb on, ledges to jump off. I even swam under a waterfall, that was so cool. Dan said it had been something he'd always wanted to do - Kevin made sure it happened. We stayed there for a good amount of time then grabbed food at a grocery store and headed back to camp.

Sunday night was another great time around the campfire, making s'mores and playing drinking games. For someone who had never been around a real campfire like that with a bunch of friends it was a great experience. It was such a good time, it was bananas. Here is a final montage of experiences:

how did you get sooooo pretty?

2010-05-28T10:16:00.001-04:00

First off, thanks! Second off, thanks mom and dad. Most of this had to do with luck. ;)

Ask me anything

Do you know what excites me?

2010-05-27T14:16:00.001-04:00

THIS!!

I am a rabid J. Crew fan. Even if my wallet cannot always support the habit, I am dually devoted. I have been stalking their dress selection for bridesmaid since I was pre-engaged and their extensive opportunities for stylizing should never be over looked. I cannot wait to schedule an appointment to see the bridesmaid dresses in person. I hope they are as gorgeous as they look online. We will also have so much fun with accessories! And suits! And shoes! Oh, my!

While I know a lot of ladies are waiting for the Anthropologie bridal boutique to open its doors, this has been such a long time coming for me! Sometimes I look at J Crew catalogs and say, "Yes. That makes sense." It would be my dream job to work as a merchandiser for le Crew (I mean...if I didn't already have my dream job as merchandiser for a Museum) and I would consider it a blessing if I could just have a smidgen of the talent their stylists have. Lime green jell-o, girls.

That's not even the full spectrum of the greatness of this launch. I feel like it could totally revolutionize the wedding industry. I'm sure Anthropologie wouldn't have jumped on the bandwagon had J. Crew not had success. In reality, it's simplifying a lot, bringing down costs and making things more accessible to a wide range of brides and bridesmaids. The economics of wedding attire could see a mighty, mighty shift.

I was going to play a game of: let's find my favorite things on JCrew.com but, MY PROOFING DISC JUST GOT DROPPED OFF!!

Let's Go Red Sox...etc

2010-05-26T10:21:00.000-04:00

I feel like my weekends have been non-stop. I haven't been able to sleep in for probably a month now. Hells bells, I haven't been able to sleep properly for a month now. The past few weekends have been filled with friends and family and still it seems like I don't get to spend enough time with the people I care about. (I'm probably watching too much BtVS)

It's at a point where my weekends have become such a whirlwind of activity that I don't even know what to highlight....maybe nothing at all except a satisfied feeling of appreciation for everyone around me. I am a lucky, lucky girl.

I wish I could say that I will be spending this upcoming holiday weekend skulking around my apartment and investigating the empty city. Instead, I will be camping in Ithaca on a wine tour (boo-hoo, right?). I am really excited to join our friends up there and have a great time, at the same time: I wish I could curl up in my bed with a book for 12 hours.

A few of my favorite things...

2010-05-25T15:44:00.000-04:00

I need a holiday, you? My high from seeing the Sox destroy the Phillies was swiftly snuffed by the lackluster and frustrating series finale of Lost (so, it was all for naught, jerks!?). As if that kind of disappointment wasn't a worse enough way to start off a Monday morning, I got iced last night by Emily Betty and Elise. Thanks, ladies - you iced me on a Monday. I don't really have a problem being iced, except when I don't have a way to block. Anyhow, the early week slump seems to have taken up residency in my pulled neck muscle - so what better way to combat cranky doom and gloom but with a few of my favorite (wedding related) things! The theme for this installment of My Favorite Things is: Etsy! Although I will be linking a lot of amazing things back to Etsy, this is just a crazy mix'em'up mesh of things. Trust, I could devote hours to cake toppers. One of these days, I swear it, I will get really good at microsoft paint. Until that day, here is my five star collection:

If you're not impressed with my collaging ability, I respect that, but look at this cute stuff!! I admit, I didn't stick to any kind of theme, rhyme or reason with this one. Next time, as I am looking for specifics and not just pretties, I probably will. Everything is from Etsy.com and I will make them as easy to find as possible, short of providing links (I'm bad, I forgot to bookmark). So, clockwise from upper left:

1. Garter in Something Blue and Orange by Piperewan, $40. Love, love, love! As a lady who is very anti-garter marrying a man who only put his foot down to defend this barbaric tradition, it was going to take something spectacular to get me on the bandwagon. Hello, spectacle! The softer versions of the colors we are using just seem perfect. It's simple and girly without overdoing it on the lace. My dress is 100% lace so I think a lace garter would be a touch over cooked.

2. Sophie, Made to Order Hair Piece by LoBoheme, $100. If there is one thing my mother and I will fight about (besides me buying my dress sans her opinion) it will be what goes on my head. She really wants me to wear a veil and I really want...well, the opposite of that! While we have some time to reach a happy compromise in the mean time I am going to drool over this kind of style - sans blusher and birdcage style attachments. "Look ma, no veil!"

3. Personalized Cootie Catcher by Katskrafts, $87.50/70 units additional pricing options. This is so cute! I would never supply it at my wedding but it is so adorable! The qualms it raises with my noxious meter are putting me off to it. While I think it's adorable to have something like this scattered about on various cocktail tables, some of the suggested uses throw me for a tail spin. Using them as ways to have your guests find out nifty factoids about your life together is pretty romantical. Using it as a form of ice breakers for the table? No, thanks. Your guests are adults - you shouldn't have cootie catchers daring them to get up and dance throughout the night.

4. Boutineer by SusieQScraps, $15. My heart be stilled! You can bet you bottom buttons that Jane is getting pictures of this. I love how elegant it is and how there is wonderful harmony between feminine romance and masculinity. Throw some navy blue or orange in there and you have yourself a deal!

5. Vintage Lace Ribbon Bridal Bouquet Wrap by GraceartandAntiques, $38. How gorgeous?! How fabulous is that touch of bling on the vintage ribbon. This may be my favorite of the bunch. I want it, I need it, I'm 100% inspired by it. My wildflower garden of gathered timeless flowers would love to be bundled ever so securely in such a demur and lovely wrap like that.

I think the lesson here is: thank you etsy! You are an overwhelming and wonderful resource of style and inspiration. Three cheers!

Also, three monumental cheers for Brian Ambrose Photo because they are sending me the disc soon! Hopefully I will have it by Friday! What started off as a cranky morning is turning into a slightly more enthused afternoon!

After Glow...

2010-05-21T11:14:00.000-04:00

Ooooohmahgah, you guys! Our engagement session was seriously a blast. Brian and Kate got to our apartment around noon and we went to Cooper park (right down the street from us) to take pictures with the little derplings, Monster and Elvis. We got some great shots with the boys. Then we headed down to DUMBO. It was so relaxed and we had gorgeous weather, we took pictures between the two bridges and in front of some really textural graffiti. We also went to the Richardson, which is the bar that we had our mini-celebration with our friends at. It was all such a blur, I can't even anticipate what pictures we are going to love...which will probably be all of them. We held hands with Jesus - kind of literally! Brian and Kate were amazing to work with overall.

They were friendly but had their eyes on the prize and kept us on the ball. They have worked with so many couples it was really nice to get genuine feed back from professionals and also to get some inside tips on where, what and who to work with. I'm just over the moon about the whole thing! I can get awkward in front of a camera and from point A to B, they were able to relax us and put us at ease. Their incredible dynamic really helps make for a great time.

For prep: I picked out three outfits, which sort of turned in to four (I got to change my shirt on the side of the street, cause I'm a pro). Mani/Pedis with Colleen were the business. If I were told I had a pedicure addiction, I would not be surprised. I didn't want to go over the top with new clothing because I wanted to be me and be in my comfort zone, but there is nothing wrong with some new shoes...yes, I am wearing them to work today!

I ended up not using the false eyelashes. You would be amazed at how difficult those things are. Seriously, I was struggling with them. When I did manage to put them on they didn't look right. While I would love to blame my incompetence on Sephora's product I have to confess that my inability to use the lashes had nothing to do with their construction. The glue was reliable and the lashes were not wimpy or easily destroyed. I am definitely still considering using false lashes for the wedding day, but they will be adeptly applied by a professional and not my clumsy ass.

I have been spying some really awesome things on etsy recently and when I have more time I will post a bajillion thoughts about them. Until that, happy friday y'all. LET'S GO RED SOX!!!!! (We do not want Steve to gloat all weekend).

Also, who else is hella stressed about the Lost series finale? Hear, hear, mates. Hear, hear.

Haterade

2010-05-18T10:03:00.001-04:00

I don't know what is going on with my internal system but my sleeping habits have been struggling for the past two weeks. I go to sleep, it is completely unrestful and I wake up a cranky, haggard looking mess complete with under-eye circles and frowns. Then I chug a giant red bull to ease my exhaustion. This morning was no exception and I am full of cranky. My red bull is hurting my teeth, we were out of Claritin this morning and my Excedrin migraine has yet to kick in. Whine, whine, double whine. Feel bad for me! Please? At least today is like Friday. It's Shavuot so, I don't have to work tomorrow or Thursday. Thursday are our engagement pictures (so I better figure out a way to get a good night's sleep)!

Michelle is coming over tonight to start Buffy The Vampire Slayer: Season 2 and watch Lost. FYI: I have a critical obsession with 1990's television. Right now I'm simultaneously re-watching all season of the X-Files and initiating myself into BTVS. I'm not an uber-dweeb, I swear (OK, yes I am). Before she arrives, I will probably be plowing through my wardrobe trying to figure out what to wear. Brian suggested one casual outfit and one dressier outfit. That does not help me, someone hire me a stylist!

Tomorrow Monster is getting his hair did and I am getting mani/pedis with Colleen. We will gossip about boys and be total haters and enjoy lattes. That is about as Sex in the City my life will ever get, I'm really not so chic. After lattes and manicures, Colleen is going to help me learn how to put on fake eyelashes. I did my usual product research and discovered that the bang for the buck is at Sephora. I got their brand of re-usable (suggested to be used 3-4 times if you're not using mascara, 2 times if you are) eye lashes. I have never worn fake eyelashes, but I wanted to try them out for the photo shoot. Why? Because it's fun! I'm pretty lazy when it comes to make up on the daily, so I think maybe a mini spruce up could provide me with some entertainment. I also want to get a feel for how I like them. I haven't even started looking for my hair and make-up artist for the big day but I want to know what I like and what I can handle.

So: wardrobe, fingers and toes, eyelashes....and beyond. I have a feeling that the eyelash experiment is going to be a hilarious (and possibly dangerous) one.

epic mini bride is epic.

2010-05-17T15:09:00.000-04:00

We had a very eventful weekend and I am exhausted. The only thing I have the energy to say is, while walking around the King of Prussia Mall, there was one of those klassy portrait studios, you know the kind? They always have photographs that have been photo shopped to look like paintings and they do senior pictures for yearbooks or prom photos at High School gyms. Well, this particular studio paid homage to the mini bride phenomena, behold:

I feel like I have to keep track of this ever growing creeptastic mystery. More on this later...

hey, bartender!

2010-05-14T10:57:00.000-04:00

That's me! I'm behind a bar. It was taken with a blackberry but look at how white my teeth are. Thank you, Crest Premium White Strips. I'm still not even done with them; I horded seven so that I can pump up the brightness in the few days before our e-session next Thursday. So excited!

I am not a bartender, so what am I doing behind that bar? Serving drinks for charity! That sounds more prestigious than it actually is because the charity was my softball team. We need money for equipment! Girl scouts sell cookies, we sell beer. This great Irish Pub, Gael, in the museum's neighborhood allowed me and Andrew (one of the team captains) to get behind the bar and pour some drinks. I was a natural at doing tap beers and I had a quite a knack with the mixed well drinks, but Kevin and Conor (the professionals) kept yelling at me for my heavy hand. Whatever, guys, all I'm saying is that people kept coming back to me! A great funk band started at 8pm and we had a mini dance party. All in all, I think it was an excellent exercise in building team spirit!

This weekend, we're going to Philadelphia to see Steve's sister graduate from college and say Happy Mother's Day to his mom. We're going to an art fair downtown so I am going to keep an eye out for unique reception decor. I am hoping to find someone crafty who can make some small-ish easels to hold our table 'numbers'. We're not actually having numbers, we're naming the tables after our favorite songs and then stuffing a mixed compilation of all of them in our OOT bags...(more on that later). Steve is going to use his artistic magic to create the signs and I am looking for some hand made type mini-easel to set against the center piece. I found some cool ones on Etsy, but I actually want to get my hands on something before I marry the idea. I'm also not sure what kind of look I want for them. There are two styles I have in mind:

I like the classic, kind of industrial, functional look of the one on the left, but the one on the right is a bit cleaner and I think it has the potential to blend better with the rest of the table. Like I said, I really need to see something in person because I go bananas about it. Maybe I'll end up deciding on something 100% different. I really think that searching is the majority of the fun.

Follow up

2010-05-11T13:25:00.001-04:00

But you totally thought I was kidding, right? Nope. Here is a mini-mini bride collage for you:

Yup, you can get matching mini bride dresses to be paired with your own bridal gown! And, here is anothering terrifying result for a search of mini brides:

Thank you, tackyweddings.com for that gem.

what the fuck is a mini bride?

2010-05-11T12:44:00.004-04:00

This is a great question and I'm glad you (?) asked. A mini bride is about as creepy as it sounds.

I am not sure who came up with the concept of the mini bride; if you google it 80% of your results are going to be for "mini bride dresses". The overwhelming merchandise and retailer response makes me think that this is some kind of elaborate way to make people overspend on flower girl dresses, but here is the gist:

A "mini bride" is neither a flower girl or a Jr. bridesmaid. It is a little girl who is dressed in a (usually elaborate) mini wedding gown. She walks down the aisle separately from the bridesmaids and the flower girl(s) and carries a bouquet. I can't confirm what order these wedding party members walk down the aisle but I am pretty sure that the mini bride goes either right before the bride or right before the bridesmaids. The mini bride is given a ring (or a necklace) at the altar.

In most cases where mini brides exist, it is the daughter of the bride who is getting married for a second time. The mini bride then says vows to her future step-father. (yes, really) Essentially, marrying him, because then she gets her ring or necklace. Creepsville: population mini brides and their Step-Dad/Husbands.

However, I have read about instances where the mini bride was not marrying her step-father, she was just a mini bride for the sake of having one. (WHY?) On all counts of the mini brides I say: what the fuck indeed.

Ask me anything

Happy Mother's Day!

2010-05-10T16:14:00.001-04:00

Did you take good care of your Mother?

My mom came to visit for the weekend. On Saturday night we went to this exceptional gluten-free restaurant called Pala. We had three delicious appetizers to share, then had their agnello pizza (lamb sausage, scallion, pecorino cheese and mozzarella cheese) and I will have dreams about that it, I bet you $5. The restaurant is wonderful because it has gluten-free, vegan, and just plain ole' normal menu options and they also have a wonderful cocktail list to accompany the food; I had the Pera and will definitely be trying to recreate it in my kitchen.

From there on Saturday we went to HiFi, an east village bar, to meet with my friends for happy hour. My mom ended up pool sharking the place. She hadn't played in years and was excited to hop on the table. Much to her surprise and everyone else's chagrin, she held the table all night as reigning champion. I made a couple of choice shots too, if I do say so myself. We went to Planet Rose Karaoke for some Crocodile Rock. I always get such a kick out of that place. It's like where serious people go to karaoke. There isn't a stage so half of the time someone is singing and you're looking around for to see who has got that voice and its just someone seated at the bar, chillin'.

Sunday we slept in and then went to Hare Field Road for brunch (Hello, Huevos Rancheros). Sunday was such a blustery day and we were pretty lazy from Saturday night (my mom totally raged) so we were up in the air on what we should do. We ended up stopping off at a jewelry store on the way back to the apt. I hadn't even thought about bands yet but saw some I liked. Steve and I got into a debate over what my band should look like. Disgruntled and determined to settle this mess we hopped in the car and over to the bridge to Little King. LK is where Steve had my engagement ring made. Not only did a find a birthday present for my dad, but I also found the perfect wedding band! I'm so excited. There isn't an exact picture of it online, but here is the general vibe:

A very lovely bezel set band. After looking over a bunch of pave settings, I ended up preferring the 360 degree diamond band. Also, with each diamond having its own setting you end up preserving the safety of the stones, which is nice and responsible, etc. The actual one I picked out is a lot different. The metal is somehow magically less visible around the stones and its engraved on the sides to give the ring a more textured feel. The diamonds end up with a weight of about .30 Carats. I don't even think I want it set in yellow gold, against my engagement ring the white gold looks just fine and the stones just really pop. Squee!! I can't wait to wear it. I'm so stoked. We obviously didn't buy it, but we took notes.

After trying on a bunch of jewelry and having a wonderful chat with the owners, we walked a couple of blocks to discover another new and wonderful Gluten Free gem, Tu-Lu's! I am serious, this bakery tops my previous uber-king GF cupcake from Risotteria. These cupcakes and cookies are so delectable - and they have vegan options. I am looking forward to going back to visit and try the paninis, too. We took home a mini-cup sampler and have been sneaking tastes ever since. Something tells me I see the possibility of a wedding cake...?

Probably! It was a really lovely weekend and I wish it hadn't ended. I am counting down until quitting time. I am exhausted! (...and I want a mini-cup)

Post Script

2010-05-08T14:03:00.000-04:00

I am working on our StD list for December. Mostly, this means that I am e-mailing my parents for addresses. We're trying to be careful with who we give StDs to. We don't want to be stuck with people we sent StDs to and then don't want to invite. On the other hand, if you send them out to some friends and not others, feelings get hurt. To avoid both scenarios we are limiting our early announcements to family and OOT friends. If anything it will be our local friend list that changes in the next year. Now, no one can get ants in their pants if we just uniformly say that no one in New York will be getting StDs.

While wrestling with my excel document and color coding Steve sends me this link and I just have to share because it is awesome.

Gowns I love, but could never wear (pt 1)

2010-05-07T11:54:00.003-04:00

I am calling this a part one because I'm sure over the next year I will see many more wedding dresses that I will love (but won't be wearing). Confession: I already have my dress. It's too early for this to be a fact, but it is. I found my dream dress online the day after I got engaged and there is a story that goes with it but I'm not going to retell it. We'll just leave it at this: I have the perfect dress for me. Here are four gorgeous dresses that are not the dress for me:
Clockwise from top left:
1. Cymbeline Paris, "Dolly", I actually tried this dress on. It's so beautiful in person and on the right girl, I can only imagine it would be stunning. It didn't look horrible on me, but it just wasn't right. I'm a small girl but I'm not straight, I have a bit of curve to me. The fringe (which is oh so soft and light weight) made my hips expand in the mirror. I still love this dress. My dress is from Cymbeline and all of the designs are gorgeous, the store in New York is also amazing. They have a great sales staff there and prices range from about $1,500-$5,000. They have a set alteration fee of $500.
2. Monique Lhuillier, "Venice", This dress is just breathtaking to me. It falls under the category of: I think it would devour me if I wore it. I love the ivory lace, very fitted bodice juxtaposed with the tiered pistachio skirt. It's unique and gorgeous at the same time, whenever I see it in ads I can't stop admiring it. Lhuillier's gowns start at $3,000 and end up around $10,000. This one is priced between $7,001-$8,500. (another reason why it is not for moi)
3. Jim Hjelm, JH8063, The beautiful organza flounce that this ball gown must have...wowee, right? What you can't see is that the back is open creating a perfect frame of classic lace. The flower accent on this natural waisted gown is so subtle that you can't even tell the extra fabric is there. My friend Amanda was married in a to-die-for Jim Hjelm gown and before I started trying dresses on, I was sure he was going to be my designer. I tried on about 6 Hjelm dresses and none of them were perfect. I priced out a few that I liked and from what I can gather he ranges from $3,000-$7,000. I'm sure he has some that go beyond that, but I haven't seen any. He also has Jim Hjlem Blush (see linked website) which features lovely, lower price point gowns.
4. Lazaro, LZ30006, I can't even say that this dress is too over the top for me, it really isn't. It has this understated extravagance that I love. It's all in the details. The ruffling is truly delicious. If I were a wedding dress designer, and I am not - I probably would have kept the neckline straight instead of adding the sweetheart. I think this would have kept the lines a little cleaner so that the skirt is the guaranteed wow factor. You don't need much after that! I haven't tried on any Lazaro dresses, nor have I priced any out, but from what I can gather most of his dresses are over $5,000.

That's that. Whose gowns do you love?

About last night (Op-Ed)

2010-05-06T16:31:00.000-04:00

Michelle and I went to Sweet Ups (a lovely spot that I highly recommend) last night for some happy hour girl time. For a while, we were the only ones in the bar except for the owner and his brother-in-law (once removed)…? The conversation somehow went like this: Arnold Swartzenegger -> Keanu Reeves -> The Devil’s Own v. The Devil’s Advocate -> Weddings?!

Obviously, I was up to bat. Benjamin (Sweet Ups owner) was telling us how he was attending his fourth wedding this year where the invitations said *Please No Boxed Gifts*. My jaw was agape, I couldn’t believe it. Four in a row, he assured me. Michelle and Jeff were a little confused. They weren’t sure what that meant. Benjamin took the liberty of explaining that it meant they were asking for cash – on their invitation. When he received the invitation for the first wedding of this nature he went to, he thought that ‘no boxed gifts’ meant that the couple didn’t want people to physically bring the boxes with them. As in, send them UPS. Maybe if this were the case then it would be all right to have that little phrase in italics at the bottom of your invitation, maybe.* Alas, it has nothing to do with shipping methods. Benjamin discovered this when he went to find a registry and discovered its absence.

It is not OK to do this! It is so off-putting and tacky. I told them that if I ever received an invitation that said that, I would buy whoever did it a present and put it in the biggest box possible. Benjamin and Jeff asked if there was anyway to simply imply that you wanted cash over a gift. Is there? I’m not sure. I would think the only way you could imply that you only wanted cash gifts would be to forego a registry. Keep in mind; there are a lot of people out there who believe giving cash is thoughtless and impersonal. If one were to take this road, they would probably end up with a toaster (or five) and a lot of less desirable things

Personally, I think that implying you want anything is in poor taste. I am not putting down registries as they have a very functional value. Those same people who would prefer not to give a cash gift, want to be sure they are gifting something that can be used and loved. Having the ability to know what the couple needs gives them some kind of reassurance that their good intentions will not go to waste. Registries also make guests aware of what has already been purchased, so you don’t end up with those five toasters. The icing on the registry cake is the newly weds get a great opportunity to buy what’s left of the wish list at a discount (a lot of registries give the couple a year to finish off their list at 10%-15% off)! However, don't send your registry info with your invitations - this is also rude. Registry info goes on your website and with shower invitations (if someone throws you a shower).

Always remember, a registry isn’t statute law. If you get surprised by some odd-ball hand crafted fertility vase Aunt Bertha picked up in Uzbekistan last year, you have to write a thank you note and you have to be genuine. When in doubt? Remind yourself that you’re not inviting these people to your wedding because you think they will buy you a bangin’ gift; you’re inviting them because you love them and you want to share a special day with them.

After this address Benjamin and Jeff nodded in approval and understanding, their brides will never make the mistake of requesting *no boxed gifts*. My job was done and etiquette’s good name defended. We went on to discuss other wedding oddities like: what the fuck is a mini-bride and is it acceptable to register for classic safari outfits?

*Albeit this would be a friendlier meaning, it’s still not right. You cannot tell your adult guests how to behave. Your invitation should not include a list of dos or don’t or even maybes. I’m sure there are other ways to politely request that gifts be shipped.

Pineapple on pizza - yay or nay?

2010-05-06T15:48:00.002-04:00

This question bums me out because I can't eat pizza! On the for reals (because I used to eat pizza) I would never order it but, I would never spit it out. Pepperoni and black olives are the best way to 'za.

Ask me anything

formspring.me

2010-05-06T10:43:00.001-04:00

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/oxbox

2010-05-05T23:13:00.000-04:00

My teeth! I think they definitely look whiter, no? I did them tonight, while I was watching Lost again.

It was a great Cinco de Mayo. My friend Michelle and I had "Tina Fey" s at a bar local to my house. We were on our way back to mi casa for some rock band, Lost re-runs, and Mike's Hard Lemonade. Then we stumbled upon Legion's $4 Margaritas. Well, we had to stop by for at least one $4 Marg. How do you deny that kind of deal? I think it may be physically impossible.

We watched Lost (a re-watch for me, first time for Michelle) and then after our Jears, Bears, and Mears, we managed to squeeze in the latest Law and Order: SVU. I am just watching the news and stripping my bottom teeth, but I felt proud enough to show off what was going on with the top - looks much better, eh?

PS. The news? Terrifying. I botched bomb attempt in Times Square this weekend and then tonight there is an abandoned U-Haul leaking fuel on the RFK bridge. It's been unclaimed for over an hour. The bridge is closed and who knows when it will be re-opened. Some people are saying that law enforcement is over reacting. I think after this weekend and the failed bombing, we should think twice before we question our police, but that's just me.

chit-chat

2010-05-05T15:57:00.000-04:00

me: I think dyable shoes are ugly.
michelle: hahahahhahahahahaha
me: Why is that funny?
michelle: cus I forgot they existed and when you said that I remembered them and how atrocious they are.

Really though, I guess I can understand why people can appreciate dyable shoes (sort of)? No offense if you love them! Please, explain them to me, if your panties are bunched. Also, please, when was the last time you saw an amazing pair of dyable shoes? The composition of this ad even screams late 1980's. Can you pair that with a peach colored, hoop skirt, puffed sleeve bridesmaid gown, please? Or, maybe seafoam?

If you're going to make your bridesmaids wear these, you best be paying for them. It would be so embarrassing to force your closest friends to invest in such a small return item. I give the dresses that, "they can wear them again" defense - but dyeable shoes? Not unless you've registered for a time machine and y'all plan to host your "'80s Night Party" during 1987.

no double, but maybe a single

2010-05-05T12:34:00.000-04:00

I was too consumed by Lost last night (wtf) to even think about white strips. There were tears; copious amounts of tears and I won't post any spoilers but, really?

I'm supposed to go to softball practice tonight but it appears someone has lost my glove. I lent to another girl on the team for our exhibition game that I was unable to make it to. Now she doesn't remember who she gave it to, frustrating. I lugged my sneakers and a change of clothes all the way to work. I hope she manages to find it before our official games start (5/11 - Let's Go Lions!). To be honest, I am trying to not let this bother me as much as it does. Missing practice is fine, but my missing glove kind of gets my goat. You would just think that people would treat a borrowed item with more respect.

Along the lines of softball, Steve got me the best birthday ever! We're going to the Red Sox (yay!) play the Phillies (boo!) later this month. We have great seats and I can't wait to go. It may be a little scary to be there in my Red Sox gear. Phillies phans can be really wild. We haven't been to a baseball game together so I'm very much looking forward to. Going to baseball games has to be on my top ten favorite things to do of all time so getting to finally go to one with my favorite person of all time is just that much more exciting.

Day Three.

2010-05-04T09:30:00.000-04:00

It's Tuesday! Tuesday should technically be day four but I totally brain farted last night and neglected stripping. I put one on my top teeth this morning while I was getting ready for work. I will double up top/bottom tonight while watching LOST. So far, I am really happy with this product. I am already starting to notice a difference with my teeth and I only have some slight sensitivity immediately after removing the strips. I avoid antagonizing this tenderness by using warm water to rinse as opposed to cold.

Steve and I did not find what we were looking for on Sunday. He is applying for a new job and had to spend 85% of the day working on his portfolio; I managed to get him out of the house for an hour or so. I was hopeful but the venture proved to be fruitless. For the record, this is what we're looking for: These are going to be the 'vases' for our center pieces. After spending two hours with our florist (Jane) and coming to a lot of great conclusions, Steve and I both kept poo-pooing the standard glass square/bowl that typically holds lower arrangements. We're both very shabby-chic, vintage inspired, created by Brooklyn, type people and the cookie-cutter flower holders weren't lighting our fire. Jane had a cut glass bowl on her shelving and I said, 'Couldn't we do something like that?' She had never worked with such a vase - but that doesn't mean she wasn't excited about the idea of using them!

We're never going to be able to find twenty of the same bowl and that's half the fun of it. As long as they are vaguely the same size and shape, I think it will work out splendidly. I don't even care if they are all clear. These bowls - I'm sure you've seen them in your mom's garage? Come in blues, greens, clears, etc. Since our colors are navy and orange with yellow and green accents - whatever color the bowl is can be heavier in its complementary color. No two center pieces will be exactly alike! Jane has done this before and showed me the end result:
She is just so talented. I never thought I could ever be so excited about flowers. To me, the best part of this all is Steve and I have a year and a half to hunt and find the twenty perfect cut glass bowls for our Wedding. We figure we will just scout out flea markets, second hand shops, tag sales, etc. Jane is kind of enough to allow us to periodically drop the bowls off at her studio so that tragedy does not befall them in our apartment.

Advice.

2010-05-02T11:01:00.001-04:00

Believe it or not, I feel like I am actually already seeing a difference with these strips.

I got some advice from some fellow Knotties and I think I am going to take it. Turns out, a lot of people don't even apply the bottom strip because you can't see those teeth as much. I don't know if I am going to stop stripping the bottom but I am definitely not going to do it at the same time. It's a little overwhelming to have them both on at once. I am going to switch off and focus on the top teeth.

We're going to a thrift store today to look for centerpiece materials!

Actually.

2010-05-01T22:57:00.000-04:00

Brushing your teeth right before "stripping" can cause extra sensitivity.

Applying round two, while watching The Ugly Truth. Here we go.

drool monster.

2010-05-01T11:20:00.000-04:00

This photo was taken at 8:45 am. It's 11:22. That is what I look like after a night of drinking at 8:45am. It's not pretty. What's sad is that I still look roughly about the same. I finally opened the package and was greeted by a pamphlet that says, "Congratulations! You just took the first step to a bright, whiter smile!" Nothing like some good ole' fashioned encouragement!

I didn't realize I'm supposed to wear these twice a day, for half an hour. They say that if I have a busy lifestyle, I can do it back to back. They don't tell you if you're supposed to start with freshly brushed teeth, but I think that is a reasonable assumption.

I'm drooling! The top one was super easy to apply. The bottom? Really not so much and it is making me drool, a lot. This is causing slippage on the bottom one. Next time I think I am going to try to dry my teeth off a little bit after brushing.

Also, keeping the gel off of my gums? Way easier said than done. The bottom one is so annoying! I really feel like it's falling off. Whitestrips struggles. Surprisingly though, the taste of the gel isn't totally unbearable. I didn't even think of the potential gag factor when I bought them. Obviously, I am not trying to taste it but the occasional gel will eek out.

I think for this hour of my day that will be spent with these things on my teeth, I will be surfing the web and watching the X-FIles on my Netflix instant queue. Right now I am watching Season 1, epsisode 10. Moulder and Scully are investigating a train derailment but they can't seem to find any train tracks.

I'm also trying to get inspiration for our engagement session. I have no idea what we should do. Our photographer is a genius (Brian Ambrose) So I am looking over his galleries and hoping to be struck by a pose. Nothing is really doing it for me though. Brian is great and has a marvelous sense of who we are so I am not too worried. On Brian's website in the engagement section, there is this really moving picture of a soldier coming home and being hugged by his fiancee; there are all these welcome home signs in the background. It is such a great shot. Sigh...love.

OK, time to rinse; my teeth feel weird. They didn't get agitated with the cold water I used to rinse off the gel. However, I wanted to do some in depth testing so I tapped on all of them with my finger nail (very scientific). I didn't realize that all teeth make a slightly different sound, nifty. One of my bottom teeth, specifically, gets a little grumpy when I tap it. I think that it may be too early to determine the exact amount of tooth sensitivity, but I don't think I am going to do anymore tapping.

experiment 1 (may cause drooling)

2010-04-30T10:32:00.000-04:00

I am not happy with my teeth. Like, seriously: I want to credit this picture for opening my eyes to the problem.

Happy 26th - complete with Yoda assuring me that I was not only a birthday girl but a Jedi Knight, and my dear friends wrapped up this month's issue of The Knot, of course. But - notice! The jaundice shade of my teeth is distracting, no? I don't neglect dental hygiene, either. I brush, I floss, I mouth-wash. Still, my teeth are in need of a pick-me-up; our engagement session is May 20th and this status really is unacceptable.

Since I do not have the funds to get my teeth professionally whitened I am going to opt for an O-T-C strip system. There are so many options out there that I feel like the shelves of drug stores are lined with whitening systems. Naturally, I went on Consumer Search to at least get an idea of where to start, if not make a decision. After professional whitening regimens - starting at $300 going up to over $1,000 - Crest White Strips Premium is the highest consumer rated product (linked to review page).
Behold! Crest Premium Whitestrips:
7 day System
Pros:
O-T-C availability
Inexpensive ($20-$35)
Easy to Use
Cons:
May cause tooth/gum sensitivity
Not as effective as professional whitening
May cause drooling*

*file under my personal favorite

I read over the past few months of Amazon reviews. There was only one review that said the strips didn't make any difference, I think that in the midst of the overwhelming positive response to the product this can be chalked up to misuse or simply a bad banana in the bunch. Of the 96 reviews only 10 were 1 star and the vast majority were 5 and 4 star. The points that I gathered from the positive reviews are as followed:

1. In the case that the strips don't make your teeth "white enough" it's easy to re-use the product to double the results.
2. Teeth sensitivity starts at the gums, so the best way to ensure that your discomfort is minimal is to do your best to keep the gel off of your gums.
3. The whiteness factor is proportional to how long you keep the strips on your teeth (duh), so follow the directions very carefully!
4. Although the commercials show people happily window shopping and being all nimbly-pimbly, no one recommends whitening in public, you may drool. Also, if you talk too much it can disturb the strip and you may lose adhesive quality.

OK Crest, I'm sold.

I have 20 days. I feel that this time allows for a couple of things: my teeth getting hurty so I opt for an every other day strategy over daily or I'm still not lil' miss smile bright and I want to try again, I can give my mouth a break and still have 7 days to rinse and repeat. I'm excited! Lunch time stop: Duane Reade, purchase, Crest Premium. Dang, I wish I didn't have happy hour plans so I could just dive in head first after lunch.

More on ouchy teeth and brighter smiles to follow....

isn't there a helvetica option on this dashboard?

2010-04-30T10:09:00.000-04:00

Are introductions in order? Ok. Well, on Wednesday I crossed over into my (eek) ‘late twenties’. I don’t like that! For arguments sake, I am going to call it ‘twenty-something’. I have two dogs and I’m getting married. I never suspected that our engagement would come with wedding-obsession as a side effect. Everything about weddings: etiquette, photography, design, flowers, venue, drama, throw it at me, please. I can (and do) spend copious amount of time on The Knot’s message boards (shout out to SB and WP). So there, there you go. My wedding is a little over a year away and all of the broader planning is done which means I can lavish in the details. Right here.